第二十三章 讲笑话比赛(1 / 2)

疯狂的兽王 服尔魔思 1659 字 2022-03-23

“噢噢噢噢……下面突然有热烈了起来。<strong>最新章节全文阅读</strong>”

“我最爱个冷笑话。”

“下面有请第一位上台的选手,谁来?”金刚问道。

“我来。我肚子里的笑话可多了,可搞笑了。”一只黄毛猫三下五除二的跳上了讲台,他还咳咳的清了一下嗓子,然后声情并茂的开始说:“某文艺挫男,父母卧病,家里穷的叮当响,老婆又肥又丑。挫男万念俱灰之时遇到灯神,灯神说把你的愿望写出来,我会满足你,挫男写:愿父母是健康的,家庭是富裕的,妻子是美的。挫男回家,子变得富丽堂皇,打开门,父母精神矍铄。挫男兴冲冲跑进了自己的房间,上躺着个空调.”

“哈哈哈哈……”突然有一只波斯猫大笑道。

然后他身边另外一只白毛狮子猫一脸不解的问道:“这很好笑吗?”

那只大笑的波斯猫被这么一问,呆呆的回答道:“不好笑啊。”

这只猫又问道他:“那你为什么要笑。”

这只猫回答道:“因为他刚才跟我说,如果他讲完了我不笑的话,我要小心点。”

“不行,这笑话一点都不好笑,下去,下一个。”下面开始起哄了。!

“有请评委给分!”

“1分!”“1分!”“1分!”“0分”“0.5分!”

“总分合计3.5分,这个笑话被列入渣渣系列reads;。”

“切,你们都不懂欣赏。”黄毛猫悻悻的下了台。

“接下来有请另外一位登场演讲。”

这时候刺皇飞到了台上的桌子上,准备了一下。开始讲:“有一个推销员敲了一家门,一个叼着雪茄,手里拿着半瓶威士忌的小男孩开了门。售货员问男孩:“打扰一下,你的妈妈爸爸在家吗?”男孩扫了一眼自己,回答说:“你觉得呢?”

全场一片寂静。连呼吸声都听不到,刺皇在这样的尴尬中下场了,边走边自言自语道:“我可选了好久才选了这个笑话啊。”

“哎,现在这群小伙伴都怎么回事,感觉完全没有幽默感啊,这都什么笑话啊。”

“是啊。这样的也叫笑话啊,那扯犊子三个字简直就是喜剧了。( 广告)”

“0分!”“0分!”“0分!”“0分!”“同情分0.5分!”

“总分0.5分,突破历史新低,这个笑话被拉入黑名单!”

“下一位,哎。拜托下一位有点水平好不好。”

“这年代手机欠费,生活太累,连讲个笑话你们都不会了,给自己两耳光,把自己打醒吧,己一天到晚都在干嘛云云古代悠闲生活。”

下面一片起哄,一片吐槽!

“当当当当……当当当当……当当当当当当当当当当……”鞭子一边为自己哼这婚礼进行曲,一边自信满满的走上了讲台。

鞭子望着台下那么多双眼睛。开口道:“今天就叫尔等刁民见识见识什么叫做笑话。我这笑话一出口,刚结婚的要跟我走;我这笑话一出口,超市送我橄榄油;我这笑话一出口。大家都说牛牛牛!”

“哎哎哎,鞭子,你特么别废话了,赶紧说啊,叽叽歪歪半天了。”

“就是,别扯那些有的没的reads;。感觉自己好像很大牌一样,走个过场还那么装逼。”

鞭子一正形儿。开口道:“好,跟你们说一个sss级别的。听好了啊。从前有个人叫小明,有一天他陪同学去献血,小明一个激动,心想,这献血是好事儿啊,于是自己也想献,果断填表,献之。结果,还没献到,当场就晕了过去。后来,那医生还给他输了才缓过来,走的时候他还想要小礼品。当时那个医生那个脸啊,烂得啊,直接扔给小明两份小礼品并警告他说:”你特么以后不准再来了!“

“哈哈哈……好笑,这个好笑。”

“哈哈哈,他妈的还好意思要小礼物呢。”

“5分!”“4分!”“5分!”“4分!”“5分!”

“总分23分,这个笑话将被收编进入王国幽默教科书。”

鞭子见下面哄堂大笑,牛逼哄哄的说:“我就说嘛,本帅在还会冷场的话这才是一个笑话。”

“鞭子,再来一个。我。”

“对,再来一个。”

鞭子哈哈大笑了十五秒之后,蛇眼一棱,道:“我就喜欢你们这种有眼光的家伙,既然广大观众强烈要求,我就勉为其难的再来一个吧,这次跟你们说一个有文化气息,有历史深度的。”

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